Often when I lecture on our Orgasm book project and female sexuality, men ask me how to help a woman to squirt during sex. In the book two women speak about their experiences. Miss Amelia said, “Orgasm is something that I crave and love to have as often as possible – a few times a day actually. I’m a squirter, a female ejaculator is I guess what they say and that makes it extremely enjoyable, not just for me but also for my partner. I can’t really fake an orgasm – it’s really obvious when I have one. And I have different kinds of orgasms, stimulated from different places.”
And Merva added, “I am telling you now that I am squirting. I was not able to do that ten years ago. I would have been ashamed. I am 37 now and I am in an open relationship. It makes me a very strong and free person. When I was younger and I was dating a guy, I would always think: “Does he like me? Am I not beautiful enough?” Today I think: “Do I like him?” Both of the questions are really hard, because I do not always know if I like him. It is a completely different place to be. You realize that every intimacy is going to be completely different. There is not one sexual experience. Every man I encounter brings out something else in me. They bring out different sexualities. There is no way to match any sex I ever had to another one.
When I started doing it, people told me: “Sex is not something you talk about. Sex is something you do”. I said: “No, sex is something you talk about.” I did not agree with them. I remember meeting people for whom sexuality was the central aspect of their life. They were writing erotic porn and they were the ones that told me: “You don’t talk about sex, you do it.” I believe this attitude to be wrong. This is why I agreed to participate in the Orgasm book, even though it is uncomfortable. It is very important to talk about it.”
Written by Linda Troeller
Featured Image Copyright Linda Troeller
Find more interviews with women about their sexuality and intimate photos in the book Orgasm by Marion Schneider and Linda Troeller